kont - arse
klootzac - arsehole
tieten - boobs
borsten - boobs
piemel - dick
pik - willy
geil - horny
ik ben geil - I am horny
je bent geil - you are horny
je bent lekker - you are hot
last, but not by any means least,
Neuken in de nieuwbouwkeuken - fuck in the new kitchen
I hope you find this as useful as I did when I went to Holland.
Thursday, 12 August 2010
Saturday, 7 August 2010
Today
Today I got hit by a bus. In fact, I am currently writing this blog from my hospital bed in Whipps Cross hospital, with various casts on and tubes entering and exiting my body in different places. But it's okay, you know, 'cause I can still type, so I must be fine.
I'll begin at the beginning. I'd arranged to meet my friend Katherine to go to the sexual health clinic (as you do). I hadn't seen her for 5 weeks, and being my usual excitable self, I ran straight across the road without looking once I'd spotted her. Simple as that.
You know, it's weird being hit by a bus. People say that your entire life flashes before your eyes in such situations, but they're all bullshitting. You're too shit scared to think anything other than "oh bollocks", let alone recount your entire life in the 3 seconds it takes to get run over.
My left leg is shattered, and my right leg is broken in three different places. I have a long line of operations ahead of me, and they're just to fix my legs. I have to have metal pins in my hips in various places, and a metal rod screwed to both of my shins. I have to have a knee replacement in my left leg, and plenty of muscle grafts.
I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell my boyfriend this, because he's on a tour of the Baltic States at the moment and I don't want to worry him. After all, everything's going to be fine.
LOL jk I'm fine, I'm just bored :)
I'll begin at the beginning. I'd arranged to meet my friend Katherine to go to the sexual health clinic (as you do). I hadn't seen her for 5 weeks, and being my usual excitable self, I ran straight across the road without looking once I'd spotted her. Simple as that.
You know, it's weird being hit by a bus. People say that your entire life flashes before your eyes in such situations, but they're all bullshitting. You're too shit scared to think anything other than "oh bollocks", let alone recount your entire life in the 3 seconds it takes to get run over.
My left leg is shattered, and my right leg is broken in three different places. I have a long line of operations ahead of me, and they're just to fix my legs. I have to have metal pins in my hips in various places, and a metal rod screwed to both of my shins. I have to have a knee replacement in my left leg, and plenty of muscle grafts.
I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell my boyfriend this, because he's on a tour of the Baltic States at the moment and I don't want to worry him. After all, everything's going to be fine.
LOL jk I'm fine, I'm just bored :)
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